Kentucky Woman Opens Up About Life and Love as an Intersex Individual: “I Was Born This Way for a Reason”

Siera Arena, 27, from Lexington, Kentucky

A 27-year-old woman from Lexington, Kentucky, is shedding light on the challenges and empowerment of living as an intersex person, offering a rare, candid look into the realities of identity, health, and dating outside the binary.

Siera Arena grew up believing she was a typical girl. But by age 16, she noticed she hadn’t started menstruating or experienced the typical signs of puberty. Instead, she began showing symptoms more commonly associated with menopause—frequent headaches, hot flashes, and extreme mood swings.

Siera Arena grew up believing she was a perfectly normal girl. But at age 16, she began to notice that she was 'different' from her peers

“I wasn’t getting any of the hormones I needed,” Siera recalled. “It was strange for a young teenager to be experiencing these things.”

A routine check-up changed her life. Medical tests revealed that her uterus and ovaries had not developed properly. Ultimately, Siera was diagnosed as intersex—a term for individuals born with a combination of male and female physical sex characteristics, including anatomy, reproductive organs, or chromosomes.

She still hadn't started her period or gone through puberty, and she began to develop 'symptoms of menopause.'

“Being intersex means you don’t fall on the binary of biological sex,” she explained. “I was born externally female, but I have XY chromosomes. Instead of ovaries or testes, I had streak gonads, which don’t produce the sex hormones necessary for puberty.”

The diagnosis forced a dramatic reevaluation of her expectations for life, love, and family. “It was a jarring realization. You grow up planning your life based on societal norms, and suddenly, you realize you’re different. It really reshapes how you view your future.”

She brought it up during a checkup with her doctor, who ran a series of tests and discovered her uterus and ovaries hadn't developed correctly. Eventually, she was told she was intersex

Despite the initial shock, Siera has since embraced her identity. When dating, she prefers to share that she is intersex only when the conversation turns to having children.

“I can’t conceive naturally, and that’s something I’m always open about in those conversations,” she said. “It used to be a source of anxiety, especially when I was dating men. But now that I date women, it’s not as big of a deal.”

While Siera felt ashamed by her differences at first, she has since come to love her body

Siera shares her journey openly on social media, where her transparency has drawn both support and backlash. “There are definitely some haters, which is mostly due to ignorance,” she said. “Not many people understand what being intersex really means.”

Despite the negativity, she remains confident and grounded. “I know I was born this way for a reason. I don’t let hate bring me down.”

Siera, seen as a little kid

Now, Siera embraces the parts of herself that once brought shame. “As I’ve grown older, I’ve stopped caring what others think. That’s helped me build confidence in speaking openly about being intersex.”

She has also found comfort and community by connecting with others online. “Knowing the words to describe my condition has helped me build a support system with other intersex people. It’s comforting to understand myself better.”

To others born with differences, Siera offers a powerful message of empowerment. “There is strength in having a unique perspective on life. Talk to your friends and family. The more you share your story, the more you can inspire and make a difference.”